That's right, after denying the rumor as recently as two weeks ago in Estoril, current MotoGP #1 plate holder, likely current-season champion, and fastest motorcycle rider on the planet Casey Stoner has announced that he is retiring after this season, at the ripe old age of 26!

Why is he doing this?  The possibilities are numerous....

It's possible that the arm-pump problems Casey has been having are worse than he's let on, and he wants to preserve his health rather than undergo surgery that is likely only a temporary solution.

Maybe his wife and new daughter have caused him to deeply consider the wisdom/appeal of continuing to risk his life on the track (a fact we were all brutally reminded of by Marco Simoncelli's accident last year at Sepang), when he's already achieved the pinnacle of the sport.

He may simply feel (know?) that MotoGP is moving away from being a prototype-based series (see the recent introduction of CRT teams, and ominous comments by series organizer Dorna), and not be excited by or interested in racing "ordinary" machines.

Or he could have grown tired of the more wearisome aspects of his job - the media circus, the constant travel, the scrutiny and feeling of needing to continually prove himself, the endless comparisons to other riders.

Perhaps, instead, in a sport defined largely by risk management, Casey feels that he has played the odds and won, and wants to go out on top.  He's achieved his personal goals, and choosing to leave while he is still almost undoubtedly the fastest rider on the grid would cement a very impressive legacy.

Likely of course his motivation is a combination of some or all of the above.  His retirement will mean an unexpected open seat at the factory Repsol Honda team, which is likely to drastically shake up the current "silly season" and its ongoing contract negotiations.

More importantly though (in my mind at least) Casey's retirement will leave a major question mark, an unsettled score.  While certainly heading in that direction, Casey's record alone does not yet warrant a mention of his name in that timeless conversation, the classic barroom debate, "who is the greatest rider of all time?"  

EXCEPT for one thing, which is no small matter and hinges (as do so many things in this sport) on Valentino Rossi, the most obvious holder of the G.O.A.T. title.  The fact remains that in taming the notorious Ducati and winning not only races but a championship on it, Casey did something that Valentino has not. 

If Casey retires before Vale sorts out the Duc or moves to a more competitive bike, and the two never meet head-to-head in another series (SBK with Biaggi and coaxed-out-of-retirement Bayliss? - now THAT would be fun) the question will forever remain unanswered:

On equally competitive machines, who is faster? Who is the true King? 

 Better start building your argument now, 'cause this is likely to be a debate for the ages......

Check out the vid:

WOW!!!

And now moving from a swoopy Italian to an angular Teuton, we have the KTM RC8R.  Completely different and equally beautiful.  To my eyes, in fact, the KTM’s lines are nearly perfect.  The stealth-fighter aesthetic gives it an air of purpose, while being so futuristic and badass that nothing else except the Vyrus even comes close.  And as much as I’m in love with the looks of this bike, there’s more to it than that.  Having spent some quality time putting an RC8 through its paces, I can unequivocally call it my favorite attainable (i.e. costs less than a house) sportbike.  Telepathic handling, light weight, a sweet big-bore v-twin, monster brakes, and it’s ergonomically suited to taller riders.  Plus RC8s are rare enough that in 3 years, I’ve only seen 1 other on the roads of Los Angeles.  I don’t own one now, but I will someday.  Hopefully without needing to give up a toe, but hey, if it comes to that I won’t think twice.

This next one is a little esoteric.  It’s not a factory-produced bike, and it’s the only 2-stroke on the list – the Aprilia RS500.  If you’re scratching your head, it’s because you’ve heard of the RS250 – the super-light, incredible-handling (some say the best), purposefully-styled replica of the GP machine that guys like Max Biaggi, Loris Capirossi, and Valentino Rossi dominated the 250 class on back in the day – but not the RS500.  See, Aprilia never made it.  But some crazy/brilliant Aussies decided to take an RS250 donor bike, heavily modify its motor to DOUBLE the displacement, and shoehorn the monster back into the same chassis.  We’re talking 250lbs gassed up and ready to go, propelled by 130 horsepower.  It’s by far the lightest bike on this list, and would be just about untouchable on a racetrack.  I’d probably grind a toe off just from the lean angles.

Okay, enough with the sportbikes.  Here’s a few that fall in more of the “standard” genre, although they may stretch that category’s definition a bit and certainly wouldn’t be slouches on a twisty backroad.  What these final two have in spades, though, is style.

The Norton 961SE is just the ticket for someone who’d like some performance along with that style.  It’s got the best of both worlds – the classic, masculine, uncluttered looks of a British café racer, with modern performance updates like top-shelf Ohlins suspension, Brembo disc brakes, carbon fiber wheels, and a super torquey motor.  Hard pressed to find a cooler machine that could still burn down a backroad with the best of ‘em.  The only color scheme offered is black and gold, as it should be…

But if, for you, style trumps all, or if you have an appreciation for the stripped-down, raw, real essence of motorcycling, here’s your bike.  It’s certainly been on plenty of custom bike sites, and in the magazines, so you may well have seen it before.  I’m not usually one to jump on the bandwagon but there’s just no denying greatness of this scale.  I present to you the final bike on my list, Falcon Motorcycles’ Black Falcon, which quite simply is a masterpiece.  Falcon took a Vincent Black Shadow, already one of the world’s rarest and most desirable bikes, and stripped it.  Re-engineered, modified, and detailed every part.  It’s completely handmade, and required a year of labor – from a team of 6 men.  At only 75 horsepower, and with a 59-year old frame and suspension, it’s got by far the weakest spec sheet of any bike on my list.  But Vincents have always been known to handle, and you can be sure that those 75 ponies are delivered with enough character to make your rate of travel rather irrelevant.    Forget the toes, I’d give up a pinky finger for this one.

Just look at the details…really is there anything else to say? 

So to hell with that, here's my list - 10 bikes that kick ass.  No apologies given.

With no dirtbikes, no tourers, no cruisers, etc it's not a well-rounded list, but I don't care. Everything here has been evaluated by my own personal benchmark for true desirability - would I give up a toe for it?

Vyrus 986 M2

__________________________________________________________________________________

First up is the Vyrus 986 M2 racebike.  Maybe the most purposeful, direct styling I've ever seen.  Its beauty derives from form following function to the extreme, like a jet fighter. 

Hand-built by a mad Scientologist in Rimini Italy, the Vyrus is lightweight, uncompromising, and super exotic.  This one's definitely toeworthy, in fact I'd probably even give up two toes for it, provided they were in the middle.

NCR Macchia Nera __________________________________________________________________________________

Next is this little beauty, the NCR Macchia Nera.  NCR list it as a "concept" but if you've got the cheez, I'm sure they'll build you one. Titanium framed and bolted, sprinkled with carbon fiber, and using the motor from Ducati's 998r superbike, the NCR is putting out 185 horsepower and weighs under 300 lbs. 

Just for comparison, a $2.7 million dollar Bugatti Veyron Super Sport, the fastest road-legal car in the world, weighs about 4,000 lbs and has around 1,200 horsepower.  So the Veyron's moving 4,000/1,200 = 3.3 pounds per horsepower.  The NCR only has to move 300/185 = 1.62. 

Another no-brainer, definitely toe-worthy.

Bimota DB7  __________________________________________________________________________________

Here's one more bike built around a Ducati engine, the Bimota DB7.  Looking at this bike's specs on a spreadsheet, you might not get it.  Yes, it's light and powerful, but for the same $40k you could have more of both in a different bike.

The problem is that it would be a different bike.  Because there's just something about the DB7 that makes me want it, badly. 

Maybe it's the impossibility of looking at it without your eyes landing on some machined-from-billet, fully-adjustable, hand-assembled goodness.  Perhaps it's the vertically stacked twin projector lights, that looked so strange and foreign on the 999, but look so perfect on the DB's face.   Or more probably it's that after having seen one in the flesh at Laguna a few weeks ago, I know that the DB7 is so incredibly thin, from the rider's seat it must feel like a nuclear-powered bicycle.  

I'd give up a big toe for this one, and never look back.

Ducati Desmosedici D16RR  __________________________________________________________________________________

Okay, enough with the partial-Ducatis, here comes the real thing.  You can write those first three off to my peculiar tastes, I'm fine with that.  But these next two should be on the dream list of every sport rider worth their salt. 

Desmo = referring to Ducati's trademark desmodromic (closed by levers rather than springs) valves.

Sedici = the Italian word for 16, referring to 4 valves x 4 cylinders.

Desmo+sedici = words can barely describe.  Here's a picture instead:

Mamma mia that is one good looking bike!   And the thing about it is, looks aren't even this bike's strong suit.  The D16 is unlike any other bike ever sold (to my knowledge), in that it is a genuine replica of a machine used at the very top level of motorcycle racing.  Notwithstanding relatively minor differences for streetability, longevity, etc, it has the same frame, same engine, same brakes, and same suspension as the real deal 2006 Ducati MotoGP bike.

They say a normal person can't use the D16's performance, and that the 1098R is a better track bike at less than half the cost.  The maintenance and insurance alone for one of these bad boys probably equals my salary, and to cover the cost of crashing one I'd have to do something seriously illegal.

But I don't care about any of that, reason and practicality just don't apply to this bike.  I'm adding a second picture to represent the two toes I'd give up to have a D16.

Ducati 916  __________________________________________________________________________________

While the D16 represents the pinnacle of racetrack performance, this next Ducati represents the pinnacle of style.  Ask a motorcycle enthusiast what the most iconic sportbike of the last few decades is, and they'll likely reply with just a number - "916".

The Ducati 916, designed by Massimo Tamburini, was an absolute revelation back when it came out in the early '90s, and catapulted Ducati into the top tier of manufacturers.  Unlike just another '90s fad, though, (did someone say Hammer pants?) the 916's style is timeless.  It's more or less commonly agreed to be the most beautiful sport motorcycle ever created, and continues to be a standard by which bike design is judged.  Doesn't hurt that it absolutely dominated on the racetrack, either.

I'd take the bike pictured here, a 998, which is the same design as the original but with a better engine.  Would I give up a toe for it?  It's a tricky question, because with the current used bike market what it is, this is the first bike on my list that I could actually attain. 

I wouldn't give up a toe for it right now, because I could get a cherry 998 for under $10k and even the little toes are probably worth more than that.  Surely, losing a toe wouldn't be a tragedy - it may only cause a slight imbalance, a wobble when you walk.  But if I'd been offered the toe bargain in '95, when I was a moto-crazy teenager and the 916 was fresh on the showroom floors?  Well, they'd be calling me Bob.

 I'll conclude part 1 there, I need to take a breather.  Look for the second half soon...